How to Ask Someone to Be Your Child’s Godparent

As we already discussed in part one of this series, Godparents should fulfill a very special role in your child’s life. When you choose the right people for the job, your son or daughter will come away with a lifelong role model and mentor. Often times figuring out who to ask among your family and friends can be a hard task, but it’s worth taking time to make a heartfelt and informed decision. 

First and foremost, you should always pick someone you trust and respect. Likewise, you should think about qualities and characteristics in an individual that are most important to you and your spouse. Decide, for example, if you have a preference for having a family member like a sibling be a godparent or if you’d rather have a close friend.

If political or religious beliefs are of the utmost importance to you, then pick someone with similar views. If it matters to you whether or not your prospective godparent is married/in a stable relationship or has achieved a degree of professional success, let that steer your choices.

Once you’ve made a shortlist of people whose values align with yours (I’d say no more than three) consider doing the following things:

1)   Ask questions to gauge interest and suitability.

Make sure you ask questions so you know if the individual will genuinely enjoy the experience and not see it as a burden. You may start by asking them about their godparents, if they had any and what their experience was like.

2)   Decide when you want to ask.

Most people wait until after their child is born, but some prefer to choose godparents during pregnancy. I’d recommend asking during your pregnancy so that you have someone who is praying with you during your pregnancy and can assist you with anything if needed. If you’re planning a baby dedication or other formal ceremony for your new arrival, be sure to ask your godparents at least a few months in advance so that they have plenty of time to make arrangements to be attendance.

3)   Be clear about expectations.

Being a godparent is an honor that comes with responsibility. If you want them to take the role seriously, be upfront about what sort of relationship and what kinds of interactions you would like for a godparent to have with your child. Think about how and when you would like for them to be in touch with your child and whether you expect them to be present for birthdays, religious activities, graduations, and other milestones.

4)   Extend the invitation in a meaningful way.

There are plenty of thoughtful and creative ways to make new godparents feel welcomed and appreciated. We love looking at Pinterest and Etsy for fun creative ideas.


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